Monday, March 07, 2011

Demons R Us and Other Stories by Alice Gaines

Demons R Us and Other Stories
by Alice Gaines
Cover art: Sahara Kelly
ISBN: 978-1-60521-541-9
Genre(s): Paranormal, Collections
Length: Collection


From the author: Welcome to my mind. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to share a bed with two demons who don't much like each other? Do you ever wonder if the nice lady at the orchid nursery has a second identity as Avenger of the Non-Orgasmic? If a man had a cat door in his house, would you expect a fairy to sneak in through it to check him out? Could a little green man be really good in bed? And what if you had two drop-dead gorgeous twins competing to mate with you? I think of these sorts of things all the time. Enjoy the madness...
The Demons R Us collection includes The Adventures of Wonderslut, Demons R Us, Fairy in my Bed, Sexation, and Eria's Ménage.
Demons R Us
Alice Gaines
All rights reserved.
Copyright ©2011 Alice Gaines

This e-book file contains sexually explicit scenes and adult language which some may find offensive and which is not appropriate for a young audience. Changeling Press E-Books are for sale to adults, only, as defined by the laws of the country in which you made your purchase. Please store your files wisely, where they cannot be accessed by under-aged readers.

First, they make you take a vow until death do you part, and then, they won't let you kill the bastard. Vicky Burke planned to divorce her dearly beloved the minute a judge signed the court order. In the meantime, she needed to get him out of her house.
She pressed the buzzer at the front gate again and put her mouth up to the intercom. "I know you're listening to this, Stewart, and I know what you're doing in there."
After a few more seconds of silence, she pushed the button and held it down. She'd lived in there for years before she'd met Stewart and had heard the unholy noise the bell made. Not even the sociopath she'd married could put up with it forever. Finally, static came out of the speaker.
"If you want to see me, talk to Lorelei," Stewart said.
"I'm not calling my own secretary to make an appointment with my own husband." Ex-husband and former secretary, ever since she'd caught the two of them doing the nasty in Stewart's Jaguar after the company holiday party.
"Suit yourself." The speaker clicked off.
She pushed the button again, and this time she leaned on it. Lorelei was probably in there with Stewart, and with any luck, the buzzing would give her a migraine. It made sense in a perverted way for Stewart to settle back into her house while she visited London on business, but what in hell had possessed him to move his bimbo in with him? He had to know she'd put their butts back on the street the minute she got home. She'd been home for days now, though, and the butt removal had proved a lot harder than she'd expected. To make matters worse, she'd had an earful from Mrs. Radnich, the neighborhood snoop, about some truly raunchy goings-on since her erstwhile love lizard had slithered back. That crap had to stop.
The speaker came to life again, so she removed her finger from the buzzer.
"What can I do for you?" Stewart practically trilled it. Phony as all hell, as usual.
"You can get the fuck out of my house."
"But, dearest, you told me when we got married that it would be our love nest."
Ye gods, had she really called a ten-bedroom, twelve-bath stucco villa with pool, tennis court, and six-car garage a nest? Probably, back when the asshole had her convinced the sun rose and set in his eyes.
"Cut the BS, Stewart. You know you hate my guts."
"Pot. Kettle. Black."
"Listen, Stewart, you can be my ex-husband or my late husband. Your choice."
"Is that a threat?" he said.
"Take it however you want, but you will vacate the premises."
He heaved a sigh so loud it crackled over the wires and came out the speaker on her end. "I can see I have to explain things to you."
"Just try."
"I'll be right out." The speaker went dead.
Vicky walked to the gate and tried it. Still locked. The asshole wouldn't even let her onto her own property to talk to him. She shook the metal like a crazed zoo ape, but the lock held, of course. Her own security system. How humiliating.

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