Sunday, November 14, 2010

The Ex-Files Collection by Dakota Cassidy

The Ex-Files (Collection)

by Dakota Cassidy

Cover art: Angela Knight

ISBN: 978-1-59596-982-8

Genre(s): Paranormal, Humor & Satire, Time Travel, Collections

Theme(s): Vampires

Length: Collection

Meet Maddie, Vicky, Katy, and Maxie. Each woman devastated -- and divorced.

So what do you do when you're drowning in a sea of pity and Häagen-Dazs? Join a support group with others just like you. Give yourselves a cute name like The Ex-Files, go out for karaoke from time to time, argue often, oh, and indulge in a crazy second chance at love with the help of your nutty new friends.

Join four women as they laugh, cry, time travel, meet a vampire and a cursed warrior, but most importantly, learn to love again!

This collection contains the previously released novellas Mayhem and Maddie, Maxie's Man, Kinky Katy, Maddie Got Run Over by a Reindeer, and Vicky the Vixen.

The Ex-Files

Dakota Cassidy

All rights reserved.

Copyright ©2010 Dakota Cassidy

This e-book file contains sexually explicit scenes and adult language which some may find offensive and which is not appropriate for a young audience. Changeling Press E-Books are for sale to adults, only, as defined by the laws of the country in which you made your purchase. Please store your files wisely, where they cannot be accessed by under-aged readers.

"Reeeuunited and it feels sooo goooood... Reeeuunited cuz it's under... good." No, not good, it was something else, but she couldn't remember. Undergood wasn't a word, was it? No, that wasn't right. Ah, well, it didn't matter. She was a SUPERSTAR.

Maddie was officially six sheets to the wind and loving every minute. Opting to karaoke via her chair, head thrown back, loud and frighteningly off key, she sang her heart out.

"Bartender..." Maddie slapped the table with the palm of her hand, "I need another drink. A big, big, big one." Maddie's head fell forward on her arms. She laid her cheek against her wrist and closed her eyes.

Maxine leaned over toward Maddie and brushed the hair from her eyes. "No, mi amiga, you don't need another drink. You need to go home and get some sleep."

Maddie lifted her head from the table and tried to focus on Maxine. "No, I want another drink. I want one with the pretty pink umbrella like Victoria has." Was that her with the slurred speech?

"Darling, you're smashed," Victoria informed her, "and I think they only give you a pink umbrella if you have what I'm drinking and you can't do that, Maddie, because then you're mixing your alcohol, which leads to puking and puffy eyes and all sorts of things that are ugly for your skin."

Maddie pounded her hand on the table again. "I want another drink." Pushing the hair out of her eyes, she waved her arm in the air, pointing her finger at the poor bartender. "You, bring me another drink and put an umbrella in it. Humor me."

"Hookay, Maddie, it's time to go home. I'm calling Corrine so we can get your address." Katy rubbed her back in soothing circles while she called Corrine on her cell phone.

"Okay, Corrine," she heard Katy say somewhere far off in the distance, "I will, I promise. Bye."

Maddie felt her head bobbing, but she couldn't seem to get control of the up and down motion. "Is Corrine going to get me another drink?"

Katy chuckled. "No, but she said you're missing the Home and Garden channel's spring extravaganza..."

Maddie sat upright. Ooh, a spring extrava... ex... extra... Oh, whatever. She loved their fall bonanza. Was it fall? Yes, it would have had to be, because there were no winter flowers and that was the last one she could recall watching. Were there flowers in the winter? No, certainly not. It was too cold. Brrr, cold.

"Okay, Kaky," Maddie said, popping up, "I have to go. The Home and Garden channel has a special tonight."

"I've called you a cab. C'mon, we'll wait outside with you. I think a little air would be a good thing."

Maddie let Katy lead her through the bar and out the door. "You are really nice, Kaky. I like you and I think your husband was a stupid head for drifting away... Or whatever he did."

Victoria let her perfect nails rest under her nose to mask the smell of Maddie's breath. "Whew, Maddie, you are snockered."

Maddie threw her arms around Victoria, knocking her slight frame backward. "Oh, Victoriaaa, Vic... turia... Vick-EEE, maybe you should get snockered too, an' then you won't be a CON-TROL freak."

Victoria patted her back and stepped away from Maddie. "Right, darling, and you're the perfect example of what I want to be when I finally run amok. Thanks for showing me the way."

"Uurre welcome." Maddie smiled, her lips curling awkwardly.

Maxine giggled when Maddie wrapped her arm around her shoulders and gazed deeply into her eyes. "Maxie, did Mr. Puerto Rico do that to you?" She referred to the small, white scar by Maxine's lip. Maxine's hand flew to her mouth, but Maddie pushed it away. "He's a mean jerk and if he ever touches you again, I'll... I'll... well, I dunno what I'll do. But it'll be really bad. So there." Maxine hugged her hard and Maddie sniffed the warm cinnamon and vanilla flavor of her coat.

"Okay, Maddie. We'll see you next week, I guess, right?" Maxine asked.

"Are we gonna get snockered and sing karaoke again?"

Katy took Maddie by the hand and opened the cab door for her. "We'll see what happens then, okay? For now you go home and get a good night's rest."

"K... Kaky, bye."

Maddie watched as the three women turned into a blur of color that made holding her head upright difficult. She liked them and she wanted to go back to see them again, but not before she had more sex.

Cole would want to have sex. She'd call Cole.

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